Fashion Thoughts & Frustrations

So, I've been shopping for a dress for my parent's 50th Wedding Anniversary Party this August.

I know, I know. "It's not till August, right? I've got plenty of time." I hear that.

And to that, I say, "Ah, so naive. Have you shopped for a nice dress with sleeves and a knee-length skirt that's not in black anytime this decade?"

The even bigger challenge is we've been instructed to pick a color for each family and the color should be in a pastel hue. I haven't picked our family color yet because I'm hoping to find the dress first (so I have more options when shopping) and let my shopping find determine the color -- which will, in a perfect world, happen before all of my other siblings pick their family colors first (blue and purple are already called for, but I can work with the rest of the rainbow for sure.).

Usually, when I start shopping I already have a pretty accurate and unyielding idea of what I'm looking for. Notions of what I'd like to find out there:

I'm in love with the idea of tulle skirts. Light, feathery, full, kind of whimsical. I could dig that. Or something different that just holds that full shape.

Along with that tulle, I DO enjoy the lace trend. But maybe just a little lace.

A cute print would also not be so bad. And I'm definitely leaning towards a fit and flare style. My short curves appreciate structure and definition.

Also, I like some texture elements. But not too much. These ruffles are nice because they accomplish that without adding actual volume or width (for the most part). I never want to appear wider, so if it's too exaggerated, I tend to avoid texture (especially around my chest and waist where I already think I have sufficient "volume". :))

What I'm finding instead of what I want is:

LOTS O' BLACK. Why do designers always retreat to black? I HAVE black. I need pastel. Color. Any color. Please.

SHEATH DRESSES -- Can I please find a dress that does not remind me of "Real Housewives of Atlanta". Please?

CHEAP LACE -- Come on now. Cheap lace everywhere does not a nice dress make. You have to add nice stuff somewhere. Haven't you learned anything from Cheap n' Chic DIY blogs? 

LONG SLEEVES -- Did I mention this is going to be in summer? Give a modest girl a little bit of a break. 

And MY BIGGEST PET PEEVE OF ALL:

BABY DOLL DRESSES -- I am a GROWN WOMAN. I want a WHOLE DRESS. Please stop telling me that I need to look like an adolescent boy wearing an 8 yr old girl's dress. I do not wish to appeal to pedophiles.  I want a WOMAN'S DRESS. Seriously. These are everywhere. What is up, people!?!?! 

I was thinking not go back to designing dresses, but you're really not giving me much to work with. Unless, of course, I can afford Oscar de la Renta or Valentino. In that case, I might have a few suitable options. Until then.....

I'm hoping my bottom feeder shopping at Nordstrom Rack and Saks Off Fifth proves to be more encouraging than my online searches. Wish me luck.